Last weekend our friends, John and Karen, invited several couples over for the evening. In the midst of food and warm conversation Karen mentioned the passing of her father this past spring. Karen had some old photos that she thought I might like to see. She was right.
The photos taken by or of Jonah Lee Outland were striking. They reminded me of another time and as Karen explained her dad's life I was drawn by the parallels of my own grandfather, Albert Fickes. Here are a few details of Jonah's life.
Born in 1927, Jonah left home at age 15. He joined the Army Air Corps in the days before there was an Air Force. After the Air Corps, he joined the regular Army where he had a career. He specialized in radar and microwave transmissions. Jonah traveled the world. As one photo indicated, he believed he was living "The Life of Riley".
Jonah retired military and became a Cadillac mechanic. He loved motorcycles, guns, and music. You could say he was John Wayne in the flesh. Approaching his 40s, he was ready to settle in one spot and he married Emma Louise Roark Outland. In short order five children followed...4 girls and a boy. My friend Karen is the middle child in the bunch. Jonah's well lived life was about to crash down around him.
Emma was diagnosed with MS. As her health deteriorated, the disease and five young children at home were too much for Jonah to bare on his own. He became angry and abusive to his wife and children. Then Emma died and the pain was passed to the children alone. The children were taken and Jonah Lee Outland, the man's man, was about to be left by himself for a long time. Karen was 7 years old.
32 years. My friend Karen did not have contact with her dad for 32 years. I hear the pain when she talks about it. I almost fear asking questions, but I believe there is an important story within the story. Last spring, dying of cancer, Jonah reached out to his children. Then he finally reached out to Jesus. It can take much for some of us to surrender and take up the cross.
Karen and John spent time with Jonah in those final days of his life last May. As could be expected, there was conflict with Jonah's children as they struggled with being abandoned as children and now reconciling with this man who had not been part of most of their lives. It can be hard to determine the price for grace and forgiveness when the responsibility is ours.
In those last days Jonah communicated more of his story and documents were discovered which revealed more truth. In the years after the children were taken Jonah went to court 15 times in an attempt to have his children returned to him. He was never successful. Still, 15 times he made the trip to court to again fail. Moments of anger, confusion, and abuse continued to extract a high price.
Jonah talked about how he had spent his entire life looking for love. He spoke of putting up walls around himself to keep others out. And he admitted that he had driven people away with his anger and cruel comments used to mask the pain that he had contained inside. In a sense, Jonah finally gained a life in facing death.
As I looked through the old photos, I saw the promise of a young, adventurous life. There was a confidence and joy that became lost. I wondered if I asked Jonah at the end how he would do life if he had another shot I would have heard some amazing comments as well as just practical advice.
These photos are too good not to share. In the coming weeks I plan to post some of these photos with comments under the caption "Good Advice for Men". I'm guessing that would have pleased Jonah Lee Outland. I appreciate my friends trusting me with these great photos and Jonah's story. I pray that I do well.
Jonah Lee Outland 1927-2008