On Monday night I ended several days of working with a small industry group. The meeting coordinator planned a dinner cruise for the final evening to allow us all to relax and celebrate our time together. Those were the only details I had about the evening prior to Monday. Since Denine was traveling with me, I had my office travel coordinator put us both on the guest list for the evening event.
Mid-afternoon on Monday one of the other guys mentioned that the dinner would be on John Wayne's old yacht. My interest was immediately peeked. Here is the thing about John Wayne...for me. Over the years I have had the opportunity to meet a good number of famous, semi-famous, and almost famous people. To me everyone is the same and there is not as much difference between those who are well known and the rest of us.
I admit that I find myself a little annoyed that we hold so many celebrities up on a pedestal. I often can not understand how we become so transfixed with people no better that any of us and often with flawed values. Honestly, I drag my feet about this kind of behavior.
Then again, could I be a hypocrite? There are several icons of our American past that transfix me. The two that come to mind immediately are Johnny Cash and John Wayne. Both were flawed men to be sure, but both have a larger than life place in my personal history.
My grandfather, my mother's dad, was named Albert Fickes. Al, was John Wayne in the flesh for me. He was a hard living, heavy drinking coal miner from western Maryland who traveled all 49 states and the South Pacific as a Navy Seal. He was a big strong man and not many would choose to mess with him. When he relaxed he liked to throw on a Aloha shirt, kick back and share laughter with those around him. He spent as much time as he could muster on or near the water.
As with John Wayne, he was a devoted family man who still managed to wreck several marriages. For Albert, it was late in life that he came back to his children and apologized for his actions and begged forgiveness. This was the point that I actually came to spend time with my grandfather and came to love him. It was clear that no one messed with Al Fickes and he would love his family at any cost. And then, as with John Wayne, cancer took him away.
So back to the cruise. John Wayne owned the yacht, Wild Goose, the last 16 years of his life. It was a former US Navy minesweeper and the sister ship to Jacques Cousteau's Calypso. It is a big wooden yacht that fits the personality of John Wayne. It was where he often chose to entertain and spend family time.
Needless to say, I was a little excited when I heard we were going on Wild Goose. It did not disappoint. It is a solid and strong boat. The captain said that the mechanics are all original from the 1940s. The salons and rooms were what I imagined. I went to the stateroom and sat on John Wayne's bed. I had to do it. Then I had to check out his restroom. Really.
As we cruised out the harbor Denine and I wandered to a salon at the stern. The sun was starting to drop. We passed through a group of 2-man sail boats that were practicing a loop around two markers. It was stunning. Denine whispered in my ear that we have had a charmed life and have witnessed many wonderful things together. She is right.
So afterward, I was thinking about this and life in general. Both Denine and Bethany are working on their 101 list. A awhile back "The Bucket List" was a hit movie and it called to light making a list of things you want to do, see, and or accomplish before you "kick the bucket". This is really good stuff. I'm thinking there is one more thing to add to these thoughts and it is something I have alluded to in the Good Advice for Men writings.
Ever once and a while you can find yourself in a situation where you have an opportunity to do or witness something new. It could be great or not so great. There could be a dozen reasons to say no. But once and a while, and more often than less, you should say yes, let's do it.
It is memorable to cross items of your life list, but during a reflective moment it is a wonder to retrieve a memory from your bucket that came about when good fortune and opportunity met. Sometimes these things meet in the most simple way and other times it something big. And they all add to the bucket. May your bucket be full.